In a complicated maneuver intended to achieve OST (Optimal Schmooze Time), Bisnow Media's Fearless First Banana (the tall, blue-shirted guynamed Mark Bisnow in a prehistoric staff photo) announced this week he's stepping outfrom the CEO role he's held since starting the company in 2004 and re-designating himself with the "happily harmless" role of chairman, aka First Banana Emeritus. He'll still be working full-time (if that's what you call emceeing) although the move is considered largely academic since no one was sure what he did anyhow. Wall Street is bracing for reaction, but pretending to take it in stride. "What's Bisnow?" one analyst said. Another stated, "Call me once more, and you'll never dial again."
Replacing Bisnow on the front line is Ryan Begelman, onetime Carlyle Group acquisitions honcho, who's been Bisnow Media's longtime brains and COO. Several staff members interviewed seemed startled to learn that Bisnow had been CEO. "That's a person's name?" asked Doug Anderson, veteran senior official. Begelman declined to comment, although sources tell us he called several colleagues this morning and said, "I waited four years for the old man to move over, and there's no *%!!*#! limo?"
Congrats to Garnet Capitol Advisors' Sherri Feldman (all the way from Harrison, NY) who correctly guessed yesterday that Dennis Quaid is 59. We couldn't believe it either. Email firstname.lastname@example.org